Well, greetings to all. And sundry, whoever that is. As they say. Or were we talkin’ about Sunday? I don’t generally greet Sundays, given the rigors and social ferment of Saturdays here in the Capital’s Nation. Or Nation’s Capital, as some folks still call it.
You know, this was all addressed in that movie, the one by what’s his name, the Italian guy, Once Upon a Mime in America? Oh, time? Well how about the book, then? That one they claim was written by a wolf? Mime and the River?
His name was Wolf? Huh. You know, comin’ from where I do, somebody says “wolf” and you pay attention. Just like “bear,” but sneakier. We still got ‘em up there. Bears and wolfs. I do pretty well with ‘em, in terms of votin’. And if you get ‘em to come to a meeting or a funeral or something, it kind of keeps the press away. But anyway, what were we talkin’ about? Saturdays and Sundays, I think it was. You know, it’s a pity that the observation of the Sabbath is fallin’ out of our socio-political ken. And as for our socio-political Frank, well, hell, I haven’t heard from him in a woodchuck’s age.
And while we’re on the subject, speakin’ frankly, I haven’t heard much about Frankin’ privileges for a while, and I wonder why the Franks of our great nation aren’t more up in the trees about it. Or Arms. I don’t know where that term came from, up in arms. Most of my constituency are well armed but out of the loop. Language is a funny old thing, isn’t she?
What? Hold on, one of the young people who run around with me wants a word. I usually have a few to spare, so … what’s that, Son? A holiday message? From who? Me? Why would I send myself a message? I’m supposed to send it where? Excuse me, folks, we gotta get this straightened out.
Okay, I believe I’m now on the same paragraph with the action, if that isn’t a contradiction in terns. Terms, I mean. We got off on that wildlife thread, and I sort of lost my path. That happens a lot, up in my district. Chronic Path Loss, we call it. Happens on Saturdays, mostly. And all the fault of the chronic interns. I asked one once why he didn’t just go on and be a doctor. He said he had to wait his tern. You gotta watch out for these etymological guys. They don’t always know what they’re talkin’ about.
Now then. What’s that? Now, then, what? That’s what I was gonna say. Don’t know why I didn’t. But if I have to, I’ll go on to express my heartiest wishes for whatever it is people in our great polity and our lesser ones, too, wish for me to wish them. From Ahmeek to Bete Grise, from Sidnaw to Spread Eagle, Traunik to Green Acres … I know, I know. I made that last one up, just to see if people were payin’ attention. Now, can we wind this up? I have to go help the President say something without really sayin’ it. He relies on me for that.
Senator Elijah Kreek represents the citizens in and around Lesser Evil, Michigan, and has served their interests almost as well as he serves his own for decades.
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